Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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