im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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