My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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