apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
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i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
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I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
When are your genitals available?
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
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