This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
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