I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Randomize