Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
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