FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
This baby is an asshole
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
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