is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
