I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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