Got a toothbrush?
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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