Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool