I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
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