Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
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