I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Randomize
