WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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