OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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