so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
