If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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