i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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