i just had sex bonerless
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
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