These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
These Dirty People Haven’t Told Their SO About Their Kinky Fetish
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
let's call it "werewolfing"
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
This is Why People Stop Sex Halfway Through
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...