WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
splinters make it hard to masturbate
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
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