this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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