I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
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