whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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