I met the friendliest cop last night
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Randomize
