I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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