do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
Randomize
