you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
My ass is underappreciated
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
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