You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
