Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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