Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
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