your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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