No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
21 Guys Share Their Insane Stripper Stories
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
27 Reasons Why Men Need To Moan More During Sex
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night