Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize
