You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
