I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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