Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
I think my moral compass just broke
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
