areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
You did what with his pubic hair?
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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