He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
the liver wants what the liver wants
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize