it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Randomize
