OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize
