just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
Randomize
