Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Randomize
