Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
