Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize