its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
you never un-have a 4some
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
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