just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I love how my cats smell like pot.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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