So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
my phone needs a breathalizer
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize
